Apple announced the latest iPad. That’s it. It’s just called iPad. No numbers or anything. It claims to be a revolutionary upgrade, but I just don’t see it. In fact I’m disappointed.
Full disclosure I have a lot of Apple crap. I love their products. I even shed a tear for Steve Jobs. That said I think the company takes itself way too seriously at times and can go a bit overboard with the pretentiousness. Never the less I had to stop for a few minutes to find out what the latest iPad offers. As everyone else has gone over a billion times here they are:
- Screen resolution increased
- Better graphics processor
- Better camera
- LTE Support (The real 4G)
- Slightly reduced pricing
Let’s break these down one at a time:
1) Better screen resolution pumped up to an unsightly 2,048 by 1,536 pixels. When I say unsightly I mean it. Most people will never, ever tell the difference. Above 1024 and your eyes just don’t register that much. Maybe a newborn would see it because everything is new and awesome but not the rest of the post-crawling-age population.
2) Better graphics processor. Ok perhaps this one will be good. Video can drag a little and recording can be a pain, so a better graphics processor is always a good thing. I’ll give them a point for that.
3) A better camera. Holy shit, a 5 megapixel camera. I can hardly breath. That’s
2005 2004 technology. My iPhone 4 has more megapixels than that and it’s SMALLER. I’ve yet to see one person, even some hard core Apple fan boys at the beach, holding up their iPads to take pictures. Wait, beach isn’t a good example because you can’t even see the damn screen in the sun. Ok how about this: Apple developers club party at the local university. Everybody had an iPad. Pictures taken with iPhones and real cameras. Eight to ten megapixels is becoming the norm for most devices. It’s good quality and size but not so damn big you’re only taking a dozen photos before running out of memory. Apple: You’re doing this on the iPhone 4S, why not the new iPad???
4) LTE. This one has to be the most interesting yet ultimately sad upgrade. LTE is great. Super fast internet speeds. I’d kill for an LTE card in my Macbook or iPhone. One major problem though: AT&T and other carriers have done away with unlimited data, and they’re raping you six ways from Sunday if you go over. Now think about that for just a moment… You’re getting the shit kicked out of you now for using 3G wireless broadband technology. Your current 3G download rates are around a megabit per second, if you’re lucky which you probably aren’t. The new LTE download rates are up to 100 megabits per second. AT&T’s top plan for new people is 3 gigabytes per month. Note the difference in bits versus bytes. To go through your 3 GB monthly cap you’d have to stream down at 1 megabit per second for or about 4 hours.
To blow through that 3GB cap with LTE would only take you four minutes. So you can pretty much kiss any type of streaming video (Netflix, Amazon, etc.) goodbye or you’ll be paying with your arm, leg, second child, and another mortgage. Until caps are eliminated LTE is a dead duck.
5) Price. Supposedly the price has been reduced. Ok that’s nice. That always helps. But it’s still hella expensive. Drop that price another $100 and I think twice as many people will be using iPad by August.
Note: After posting I did learn of two new points: more memory in the new models, and a much larger battery. Cult of Mac has a great article on this latter point.
So there you have it. The newest amazing product from Apple. I really, really wish they had made it lighter by swapping aluminum for carbon fiber or polymer. I wish the screen went edge to edge instead of this stupid bezel around it. I wish more had been done to improve the cameras. What about NFC? Bigger hard drives for less? There are so many other improvements they could have done to this iPad that would have made it a steller purchase. Yet just a few weeks after the birthday of Steve Jobs we’re still handed this sack of shit that is minor, incremental improvements, spun and sold as much more than it really is.
I remember when Apple was releasing products as soon as they were conceived, leaping dramatic steps over previous models. Now we’re down to a trickle, once or twice a year. Come on Apple, Steve’s dead, you’ve got more money than the Vatican and a few dozen countries COMBINED. Show us INNOVATION not mini updates to keep sales going. Be bold, be daring, be Apple dammit! I think our friends over at the Gentlemans Rant says it best in their iPhone 4S outtake spoof. (Note: this is satire!)
EDIT!!! THEY MADE ONE JUST FOR THE IPAD!!!!!